Typically I write a year-end post sometime after the holidays, but ain't nobody got time for that! And frankly, I just don't feel up to a recap. However, I've been feeling the call to write lately and have pushed it aside because I have no flippin' clue what I'll talk about. How do those successful mommy bloggers do it?! Some of them post daily!! I don't even poop daily!!Needless to say, my lack of posting isn't a bad thing b/c I'm not high functioning outside of Momming duties and work. All I talk about are my kids and whatever milestone each of them have hit or the creative new way they've discovered to drive me insane. Since I work at home and my husband works outside of the home, I am alone to juggle kids and my job simultaneously, which leaves me frazzled and fried by 3pm each weekday and weekends are such a cluster fuck...I. Can't. Even. I don't have witty "today in the office" anecdotes to share. My entire world revolves around the humans that popped out of my vagina and the man who hasn't seen that vagina in weeks.
There are some economic benefits to being on the fringe of my own personal shit show. For example, I single-handedly keep my favorite Dutch Bros stand in business and I'd bet I've put at least one Bro-ista through college with my iced skinny salted caramel mocha addiction. And I'm pretty sure I keep the people who make the generic pink razors in business b/c when I actually do take a moment to shave, my hair is so overgrown I burn through the whole 5 pack of those little beauties on a single leg. That's job security right there. If you think about it, that practically makes me a hero.Maybe instead of looking back, I'll look forward a bit. New year, new me, right?! (What a crock!) The hubs and I have made the decision to get back into our nightly family walks. That is, after his knee heals from almost breaking it at the dump on New Year's Eve Eve. We both felt much better when we were getting those 3 miles in each night and if we timed it just right, it would put the littles to sleep. Score! There's also my middle kiddo's 4th bday next month and she wants a Harry Potter themed party. So that'll provide me the chance to indulge my nerdy side in a hurried and half-assed, two-days-before-the-party way. You know, the usual. The spring should bring some adventure as we take our teenager to fulfill her current dream of seeing Hamilton the Musical. The summer will bring with it my last baby's first birthday and our inevitable trips to the coast. Hopefully by that point, our nightly walks will have helped knock off a few of these lingering pregnancy pounds. (These last 39 lbs are getting way too cozy for my taste!)
After spending some time lending a hand for to the Lotus Rising Project's Alternative Prom and Pride Parade last year, I'm definitely ready to put myself to good use in that capacity again. I'm currently considering joining the board of a local non profit that will marry two of my favorite things: volunteerism and drag queens. There's a lot more to it than that, obviously, but until I am on the board and really putting in some time and energy, I won't write too much about it. Especially if the other board members get to experience my own special brand of craziness and decide not to vote me in. I'm sure if I do manage to trick them into believing I'm not a complete mess, I'll have plenty more to say about the organization and the great things they're doing for the community. That is what I do best, after all: run my mouth.
At some point, I do intend to post more on this blog. Writing is my "thang" and not being able to indulge that has been tough on this old broad. It's not entirely a time issue so much as it is a mental one. My brain is tired and when it's tired, it gets harder and harder to spark my interest enough to make words. It's a big reason why I never pursued writing as a career. I feel like professional writers have a zillion thoughts and curiousities that give them a neverending supply of creativity and material. Some are even good at writing about things other than themselves, which is not my forte at all. I have no shortage of stuff to say when there is a particular thought weighing on my mind or an idea lighting a fire under my butt. But when my mind isn't functioning, it comes out in run-on sentences with zero substance and smaller words. If my own post is boring to me, I imagine how awful it is to those few folks to decide to read it. Then I play over in my head all the terrible things I imagine those people saying about me and my lack of talent. This goes on for days until I'm nursing a bottle of Pepto to calm my nervous ulcer and retreating into yet another binge session of Roseanne. And since I just finished the series a couple months ago and there is a new season coming in March, I think my best option is to have these long dry spells vs posting for posting's sake.Until my mind is awake enough to be full of grown-up thoughts and not trapped in an endless loop of cartoon theme songs and wondering how many sticks of string cheese a toddler can eat before it ends in constipation, expect to see long periods of time between posts. Eventually I'll rejoin the land of adults who don't wear jammie pants all day and complete a sentence that doesn't quote Daniel Tiger. Today just ain't that day!
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