I'm participating in the Blogging from A-Z Challenge again this year. Today's post is brought to you by the letter E.
I know to a "normal" person it probably seems morbid, but since I was a teenager I've often wondered what kind of eulogy those closest to me would write when I die. This isn't a thought that is born out of depression or a feeling like I want to die; it has just randomly popped into my head when I'm in one of those ridiculously introspective moods. There are times I've even considered writing a eulogy for myself, just so I can throw in some hilarious and snarky quips that I know would break up a somber mood and make my friends and family remember that humor is one of my strongest assets. It would definitely be vulgar, at least to some degree, and the word "balls" would be used no less than five times.
I think the question about my eulogy stems from my need to have people recognize how hard I work at being a good person. I can freely admit that I have an insatiable need for validation. (On the same token, I get very awkward and don't know how to handle compliments, so figure that one out!) I want people to truly understand what I've overcome in life so that the few successes I have had are that much more meaningful. I haven't had a lot of grand moments where I've done something monumental or wildly successful, like starting a business or being published or winning the lottery. I'm a small fish in a ginormous pond and I feel that every day of my life. I just want someone to recognize that though I haven't accomplished anything huge, I'm not a failure.
Maybe someday I'll feel compelled to stop thinking about it and actually sit and write some kind of eulogy for myself. Something that captures my craziness, my humor, and will serve as a way to give my friends and family one last opportunity to roll their eyes, smile, and say something like"that's Trish for ya". Above all, I want to make sure when I'm gone, there are plenty of moments where the people I love most will recall a funny story about something crazy we did together and feel like I enriched or blessed their life in some way.